Volume IX, Issue 3, Page 149


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After much debate, the winner is Brandon Smith from Oklahoma City, OK, who submitted:

"Wal-Mart...now hiring enthusiastic go getters for new shopping cart return system... "

Getting Honorable Mentions are:

"Darwin Award, here I come! " -- Dave Wallace

"Russion space agency's passenger program - a fe hundred thousand. Tickets to Billy Bob Thornton's new space movie - around $20 bucks. This idiot actually thinking this may work...Priceless! " --Don Butwell, Toronto, Ontario

"Hi! I'm Wild Bill Shrewsbury! How much do you think a track operator will pay me for a combo track dryer/wheel stander? " -- Alan Miller

"Dude, are you sure this is how Roger Gustin get his start? " -- Jim Mulcahy, Tucson, AZ

"Jackass Part 3!!! " --Justin Triplett, Spring Hill, FL

"Ahh...the turbine in the rear oughta cause a lot less body damage than yesterday when we had it in the front. " -- Thomas Moore, San Jose, CA

"NOS Pro Mods final attempt to level the playing field. " -- Tom Drake, Matthews, NC

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